So glad you are finding ways to get Lampy to sleep! I thought of you often while I was on my marathon vacation and my babies reverted back to sleeping patterns that were, um, less desirable.ReplyCancel

I am in the minority, but I LOVE LOVE LOVE the newborn phase. However, I am kind of a hippie and nurse at will. None of my kids slept through the night until they were 2 but newborns are so easy compared to "get into everything" toddlers.ReplyCancel

I'll take 50 newborns over another pregnancy. Ugh, I get sick just thinking about it.
If only children could be bartered…can I trade my naughty three year old for your newborn?
Danen heard about women who are addicted to having babies on NPR one day and diagnosed me with the condition. The only problem is, they don't stay innocent babies for long.
Just hand Lamp over already and I'll give her back in about 10 months!ReplyCancel

I'm with you and Molly – LONG pregnancy please 🙂
Lyndal.ReplyCancel

A newborn is A LOT of work, but I would go back to those days in a heart beat. That first year, to me, was my favorite. And I often thought to myself that God makes newborns grow up quickly so we will want more.

But then I can say this because my youngest is 24. Real easy for me to say now, huh? You are in the throes of continual interrupted sleep! 🙂ReplyCancel

Well I'm glad to know I'm not the only person who would choose a longer pregnancy.

I do agree with a lot of you about the preciousness of newborns and just how special they are….but that lasts about a couple weeks before I go into bonkersville.ReplyCancel

Made me think of you: http://parenting.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/08/20/becoming-a-family-of-four/?partner=rss&emc=rss

I haven't read the article yet… just the headline so far 🙂ReplyCancel

Don't know if you will read this comment anymore. But I have thought about this question in the past. If it helps at all–the fundamental difference between humans and other mammals, particularly when it comes to pregnancy and birth, is that we are bipeds with small pelvises and big old brains and they are quadripeds with huge pelvises and tiny brains. So, their babies can stay in and develop longer, and they also come out more easily. But they can never match our mental potential (and sometimes not our physical potential, either).

Anyway. Probably not the response you wanted, but I like to ask myself the question whether I would rather be a human or have a tiny brain and walk on four legs. And my answer is always–a human, but why can't we just have pelvises that expand more? Which of course is just another question, not really an answer.

By the way. Your sweet Lamp is absolutely beautiful. Will another "hang in there" help? I loved what you said about when you're struggling, think how many other mothers are going through the same thing. And of course with the help of the Atonement too, when things are really hard.ReplyCancel

I really liked this post. You are a fabulous writer. I wish I could help you out somehow. Just know that people are thinkin' of you, and wishing you the best!ReplyCancel

Thanks for your comments ladies.

It's a wonder we ever live through this whole motherhood bit.

Likely, that's good to hear. Yes even my own mom talked with me about her babies and how hard they were for her. So GOOD to hear.

Adri–thank you again. I have to say I find myself jealous of moms who are past this whole baby phase and I feel like I should bow down to you…(you are past the baby phase right? :))

Abbie–Exactly why I love blogging as well. It has been SO therapeutic. Especially from the stay at home mom standpoint…like you said, just knowing I'm not alone helps so much.

Thanks you guys.ReplyCancel

You know Amy, I'm really feeling for you right now because I've felt and still feel the way you just described. In fact Claire is almost 8 months old and I'm still struggling with those feelings. It's lonely and hard and newborns and the uncertainty that comes with each day not knowing how they will be and if and when you get them to sleep how long will they stay asleep, and the crying–oh I get anxiety just thinking about it so I know I am of no help but at this moment I'm thinking about you and want to cry with you because it can be lonely at home, by yourself with your little ones. It just doesn't feel good to have a little pit in your stomach like I seem to always have lately. In my perfect world I would have a "turn off feeling knob" on my body.

The suburbs are definitely more isolating–ah, sigh . . .

Anyways, you are inspiring and I really do think little lamp and beanie are lucky to have you as their mom.ReplyCancel

Thanks for your comment on my blog! So sorry we haven't been able to connect recently. You are totally fighting the good fight, here! Even though Gabriel was such a less fussy baby than Noah was, it was SO hard to have another little newborn. You've described the feelings perfectly. Especially with husbands MIA and demanding preschoolers in tow. Just remember how quickly things change and how many little phases they go through. It seems like your blog is so theraputic for you, so important to have stuff like that. For me it's exercise — totally obsessed right now, but it's the only way I get through my days! Let's try to touch base on the phone soon! Call me anytime — I lost all my contacts when my phone died 2 weeks ago.ReplyCancel

Miggy, (this might be too much info., but I'm sharing anyway 😉 )

Yes, I'm past the baby phase. But I'm a "nut", because I STILL crave having another baby. I know, gasps across the board! I think I'm the only person on the planet who LOVES being pregnant (well, minus throwing up 2 times a day for 7 weeks straight), and loves giving birth even more! I swear, I'd have 3 more babies, if I could.

Sadly, my husband and I know our family is complete…everyone is here. Happily, I DO know that no one is missing in our family (through many wonderful spiritual experiences), which is a great thing! However, it means that my baby-craving will never be satisfied. I've decided that if we don't move (my husband's job is on the rocks), I'll sign up at our local hospital as a volunteer…and just hold those precious babies for as long as they need me to 😉

I won't lie though…it's much easier when kids are older, and you can "reason" with them. Yet, when those precious babies get strong personalities of their own (ready to go into the wide, wide world), it's a completely different set of challenges, which are equally tiring, frustrating, and worrisome.

Parenthood is definitely the most intense, most WONDERFUL, and most challenging job EVER created. That's why I love being married. I don't have to do it alone! 🙂ReplyCancel

So very true. The entire post rings true, and is SO relatable.ReplyCancel

Your post takes me back about 4 months ago when I was alone with a crazy colicky 3 week old baby and a toddler all by myself for 3 days straight. Yup. No husband. It was really hard. Let's be honest. It just sucked. All three days and all three nights. Pretty miserable. I'm so glad that babies really do learn how to sleep better. Good luck with your little one. Your getting closer to that happy sleeptime schedule!ReplyCancel

That's going to be my new mantra too. I needed this today because I TOTALLY relate.ReplyCancel

Think of those WWII advertisements with the pretty women trying to look buff flexing their muscles and the phrase written below: "You CAN do it!" 🙂

I see that the sleep issues have improved since you posted this, and I'm glad you got a few nights of uninterrupted sleep. Things WILL get better, and even though you are alone at home, just remember you have a ton of friends in similar situations and you can always call them for empathy!

Miss you and the Western Hills Ward girls!ReplyCancel

You are so beautiful and wonderful! You must keep writing. Your strength and insights are inspiring. I'm so glad I finally got to read your posts…I caught up with your mom a few months ago. Your girls are absolutely precious and you're doing fabulously well…it is VERY tough and makes you so strong!!!ReplyCancel

You win! Contest over.ReplyCancel

If for some unimaginable reason you DON'T win that serger I am going to buy you one myself. Seriously–pick out the serger of your dreams and send me the link and it's done.ReplyCancel

You need a serger.ReplyCancel

Dearest Miggy,

Hope you read my post (late) on the beautiful nursery you designed and created for Lamp!
I mentioned the beautiful quilt you made and thought that it was one that you made by hand! And I was SOOO remembering how you learned or actually "taught" yourself to sew, and how amazing and talented you are! Funny that I was thinking about those things just last night.

I hope the judges read all of your blog and see how many wonderful and creative things you do. And even that last Christmas you gave away one of your beautiful play tents, and a few other things you made! How great was that!

And while you have blessed so many with all of your talents, no one will be blessed more that Lamp especially with a serger to transform ALL of her clothes!

YOU win Baby Girl! It must be so!!!!!

All my love,
G.G.ReplyCancel

I entered the contest, too, but I HOPE YOU WIN!!!ReplyCancel

How does this contest work? can we 'vote' for you or help you win? That was amazing.ReplyCancel

You totally just won that. Enjoy your serger!ReplyCancel

In. The. Bag.ReplyCancel

My sister, Urban Tangerine, sent me to your post. (I posted for the same contest…) I think your entry is great, but what I really want to know is why you don't have any tents for sale on your etsy store? That's just ridiculous! You must have sold out already.ReplyCancel

Ug. The not sleeping is the worst. I swear by the miracle blanket. I only used it on my 3rd, but seriously fixed all sleeping issues over night. And, I passed it on to a girlfriend who now swears by it too. And it is now my standard shower gift. It isn't cute, but wow. It is the one thing I won't do without if I have another newborn. http://www.amazon.com/s/ref=nb_sb_noss?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=the+miracle+blanket&x=0&y=0&ih=11_7_1_0_0_1_0_0_0_1.55_140&fsc=-1ReplyCancel

(Sorry, this is long! Take what you want from it, or don't…it doesn't bother me either way.)

I could be totally wrong, but your sweet Lamp sounds a lot like my oldest son was as an infant…which is a tiring, but wonderful thing! He was very alert, and always wanted to be part of the action. We had a heck of a time getting him to sleep, and staying asleep.

After 2 weeks of doing what the baby books said, I threw it ALL out the window, and went with my gut…which may or may not seem dangerous 🙂 I figured that Heavenly Father sent me this baby boy for a reason, and it must be that He trusts me to do what is best for him.

That meant several things, but in terms of sleeping (don't cringe!), it meant letting him sleep on my chest many times in the early night or early morning (I know, they say DON'T co-sleep, so I would only do this when I was NOT exhausted.) I know they do this with preemie babies, I think it's called "skin-to-skin" or something. It really helped him. He craved the connection with me or my husband. Which also meant I spent hours during the day (too) holding/playing/reading to him, etc. (You might want to try a baby wrap? http://www.mobywrap.com)

I know it sounds crazy, but my son was showing us his strong (amazing and wonderful) personality from DAY ONE. When he was 4 months old, I remember telling my mom, "I swear he's bored!" Yup, I was right. Ever since he was a brand new baby, he's been going going going! (I was so exhausted from him as a toddler, I took him to two pediatricians to see if he had ADHD. They both laughed at me, and said he was FINE, just smart and very active/alert.)

I completely feel your pain if you can't fix the sleeping issues. I shouldn't tell you that my son is 10 now, and he STILL hates to go to bed. We literally have to run him ragged every day, just so we can have a full night of sleep. We used to joke all the time that he's really twins!

I'm guessing here, but I think it must mean Lamp has a dynamite personality, and she is READY to conquer this crazy world 😉 Hang in there! (I'm a nut for babies…I wish I hold Lamp for you when you need a break!)ReplyCancel

This sounds normal to me, but it still stinks. I'm sorry.

This is what I did with audrie: put her in my bed and nursed her lying down after she was out for 10 minutes, I would roll off my bed and sneak out. I would check on her often to make sure she didn't magically learn to roll at 7 weeks. I would sometimes do the same thing on a blanket on the floor. I know it sounds crazy, but she would sleep for an hour (which was awesome cuz she wasn't the best napper before that ).

Eli was a totally different story – naps only happened in the moby wrap.

Good luck!ReplyCancel

I scoured the baby books and hounded the pediatrician and called my mom and called my sister and called my friend who all gave different advice. I prayed and cried and cried and got really frustrated. Then I decided to go with my gut. Jury is still out on how it will go. Parenting is without a doubt the HARDEST thing I have ever done.ReplyCancel

I loved your last photo by the way. So romantic!
For me, it seems like with babies there is this constant adjusting and re adjusting. You have to find just the right combination of sound, rocking, sleep location, etc. My newest babies slept in the car seat a lot. Then one slept in the swing a lot. It seems like right when I'd get in a good rhythm, though, the baby would get a cold or we would travel and all would be lost! Good luck. I am not a fan of the tiny baby stage either. I am too stressed and sleep deprived. I love your blog honesty!ReplyCancel

The adjust/readjust comment could not be more true for me! Just when I think we have it down, it changes just a little bit. Teething, growth spurt, vacation, weather… you can never really re-create the same exact conditions every single night.

PS we're now at my parents' place and it's been rough! I'm having Jared pack the baby sleep books when he joins us in a couple days. Haha/sigh.ReplyCancel

I'm sorry Amy. Violet took A LOT of soothing! The only way she would sleep for the first 3 months is swaddled tight, in the swing, in a dark room, with white noise. CRAZY… I was so jealous of mom who's babies would fall asleep in their arms and transfer to the crib just fine. We went through so many D batteries!
6 weeks was the worst. It might magically get better next week…I hope so. Hang in there. You're doing a great job 🙂ReplyCancel

Oh my goodness thanks for all the advice. And even more, thanks for the moral support. As I read through all these stories and the ups and downs of babies it amazes me that any of us survive parenthood and childhood for that matter.

Ellen–exactly! You'd think after Beanie I'd be fine dealing with almost any sleep issues… especially so early and with a baby who is also so much more pleasant otherwise. But that's sorta my point–I just get all worked up and anxious over having babies. I feel like other people have a greater inner strength or somehow just deal with it better, because even with this baby I feel all out of sorts and frustrated.

Christina–Yes I've used a sling too and luckily that works and allows for some hands-free afternoons.

Abbie–I did just that today. Except instead of leaving after 10 minutes, I stayed for 3 HOURS to make sure she'd sleep. See….I'm obsessed with sleep. Which brings me to my next point….

Is anyone else obsessed with sleep? I'll do whatever it takes to get those LONG naps. Granted, when everyone leaves I won't be able to sleep with Lamp for 3 hours while my toddler does-who-knows-what…but since I'm a big believer in sleep begets sleep, I have a hard time not doing everything in my power to maximize any and all sleep. Anyone else like this? Or do you just do what you can and then call it good no matter what happens?

Carrie–Wow. See, that just sounds hard BUT I really admire your attitude about it all. I have to say, if it were me I think that sleep issue would send me into a depression. I don't mean that sarcastically,I'm serious. Which is why I say again, I sometimes feel like I just don't have the same inner strength as some people to deal with these things…

Deb–arrgh! Yes traveling is hard. Even when you have other people there, it's not the same as having your husband who understands and knows the babies almost as well as you do. I'm so sorry.

And thanks to everyone else for the really good comments.ReplyCancel

I'm so glad you asked…who doesn't like to talk about their sob story?! I feel for you. Julius slept great the first night of his life in the hospital and didn't do that again until he was 8 months old! I know that's not encouraging…but what I'm saying is I think it's very normal. (By the way…Of all the books I read, I liked that book too.) Before 4 months we just sucked it up. Then we tried letting him cry himself to sleep at about 4 months…after about a week I decided he was still to little. It wasn't working…he didn't get it yet. Sometime later I heard you shouldn't try that until about 6 months old…but I don't know if that's true or not.

All I can say is…patience. We tried absolutely everything you could possibly try. Nothing worked. He wasn't sleeping for more than 3 hours at a time at night, was almost impossible to get back to sleep when he woke up and to top it off…he wasn't even sleeping during the day. Ken would leave for work and I would cry because I was so tired. But we just kept trying to keep him on a schedule as much as possible and when he was about 6 months old just let him cry himself to sleep every night…sometimes for a couple hours. Sounds awful…but it was worth it. I think for Julius it was a combination of our efforts and just being ready. He is still a light sleeper (he gets it from Ken) and I think it just took him longer than some babies to figure out the sleep thing.

Buy ever since 8 or 9 months he has been an incredible sleeper. We drop him in the crib wide awake, hugs and kisses and he falls asleep all by himself. He's almost two and sleeps from 8:00 to 8:00 and still naps for at least 3 hours a day. But it was a long road and I'm not looking forward to switching him to a toddler bed! I think I'll keep him in the crib with the tent on it until he's like 5! Hang in there.

I literally didn't get more than three hours of sleep at a time, day or night until he was 8 months old. Needless to say I was a zombie and and didn't want any more children at that point.ReplyCancel

I feel you. It's been almost 8 months and I don't have a sleep schedule down. Lately, I've been getting up two to three times a night to nurse. Help me. When he was about 2.5 months he started to projectile vomit every night before bed and that lasted a month and a half. It sucked. So, needless to say I'm not great at sleep advice. My first one loves it, my second one kind of likes it, He just likes to be near me. I think your baby is adjusting to living outside of the womb and it really will take about three months to get it down. My friend let her baby CIO at 2 or 3 months and she said it worked and it's been heaven for her.

What sort of worked for us, was the Baby Bjorn. Che would put baby Buster in the Bjorn and cover it with a blanket and then walked or jogged around the house until he fell asleep. Then he put him in bed with me or in your case you could put her in the cirb. I think the Bjorn has worked better then the wraps to be honest. I've tried all sorts of wraps and the babies both seemed happiest in the Bjorn.

Good Luck!ReplyCancel

My advice is to accept any help that comes your way, and don't be afraid to ask for it!
Speaking of…
what can I do?ReplyCancel

Have 7 kids. My 16 week old was hard to put down. The dvd Happiest Baby on the Block helped a lot, as did the Miracle Blanket and the Moby wrap when nothing else works. Stick with it, eventually something works.ReplyCancel

I love this picture! Happy Anniversary.ReplyCancel

Happy Anniversary!!!!!!!! FIVE YEARS! What a milestone!

LOVE and hugs to you both! You are great together and have lots to celebrate! We are happy for you! Hopefully you can get in a little celebration this weekend.

All our love,
GG & PapaReplyCancel

happy anniversary!!! we are right behind you guys. lots of love!ReplyCancel