My Beauty Secret: Being Present

When I was a new mom and overwhelmed, as most new moms are with the task of well, mothering and more specifically, the realization that “you mean I have to take care of it ALL THE TIME?” I quickly started to spiral down in a haze of post-partum depression.

Survival was the name of the game those first few weeks, but quickly I realized that certain patterns and habits weren’t going to work long term. For example, hanging the blow dryer on the door handle while it ran at full blast while baby girl napped for 2 hours at a time was not going to work for the next 3 years.

I also realized that if I was going to start feeling better, part of that was taking care of myself, which included getting up, getting showered, getting dressed, and doing my hair and makeup every day. Getting ready in the morning actually became one of my best natural post partum defenses with my first baby. (With subsequent pregnancies it would be actual medication which I highly recommend.) I hope no one sees this as an attack on my fellow mothers or that if you are a yoga pants and hair-in-a-bun, no make-up kind of gal that I am looking down on you. I am not. To each their own. I am simply speaking about what made me feel better. When I look put together, I feel put together. Simple as that. But even more than that I am able to be present. If beauty is about feeling good inside and out, and being the best version of yourself–and I think it is–than being present is one of the best beauty secrets I have.

This reminds me of advice I once heard that a mother gave her daughter: When you go out, get ready, do your make-up, your hair, coordinate your outfit. All of that. As soon as you get out the door, forget about yourself. Sound advice. As a mom this advice rings especially true. If I feel frumpy all day, I check my frumpiness in the mirror, I tug at my hair, I look in the mirror over and over again trying to magically will myself to look and feel pulled-together. If I take the time to get ready, I can forget about myself and BE PRESENT. This is magic. It’s a very symbiotic relationship… being present helps me feel beautiful, and feeling beautiful helps me be present.

Since I only wash my hair 1-2 times a week it’s important for me to have a deep moisturizing shampoo and conditioner along with a deep conditioning treatment. Enter Garnier® Whole Blends™ that allows you to ‘find your blend’ and get the best shampoo/conditioner for your hair type. The older I’ve gotten, my hair has become dryer which is why their Nourishing line with avocado oil and shea butter extracts really fit the bill. Not to mention a deep conditioning mask that I use about once a week. Garnier® Whole Blends™ left my hair soft but clean so I can get a good few days out of one wash and fugetaboutit.

I’ve also got another little trick for being present and it’s definitely one of my best defenses against going ape-shiz crazy during those late afternoon, early evening hours when everyone has obviously boarded the crazy train.

Also, it’s 100% natural, drug free, hormone free, gluten free, sugar free and in recent study trials (at my house) the results have been 95% positive.

Music.

When it’s 4:45 and the kids are falling apart one-by-one, as they do, and dinner is on your mind, your husband just texted that he’s going to be late, and one of your kids breathed on the other kid causing earthquake levels of hysteria and your youngest is grabbing onto your leg making this face:

Try turning on some music.

Music creates energy. Energy affects ambiance. And ambiance creates moods. It’s true. Probably scientific even. Here’s what will happen, if you have the right music on–for the family I often choose the golden oldies station on Pandora–a new energy will come in the house, spirits will be lifted and the entire mood can shift. I kid you not, I have watched my children stop mid-argument to start dancing a great song that just came on. (This Du-Wop gem is a current favorite.) This has happened in real life! Which doesn’t surprise me because if I have the choice between yelling at my sister or getting down to a groovy beat, groovy beat is going to win every time.

BUT sometimes the kids have their impenetrable mood-boosting force-fields on, and the mood doesn’t shift and the chaos continues. Well a different magical thing can happen with music–the circumstances don’t change, but something inside me changes. The music becomes like the soundtrack to my life, and like a movie soundtrack the music helps me notice what is really important, once again keeping me present. When a great song is playing in the background, and chaos is unfolding around me I feel differently about it all and I realize that these crazy moments are just as precious as the calm moments. Craziness and chaos bring their own texture and feel to life that adds to, not subtracts from, the whole. A song with a sentimental vibe to it brings my awareness to these fleeting days with young children and shoot, it really will all be gone one day won’t it? Soak it up. An upbeat, female power song makes me feel like I can handle. this. shiz. No way a few whiny kids are going to bring me down. And a funk-filled dance tune just helps me embrace the chaos and dance through it anyway because really, what can you do?

So there you are, my very best tips for being present and feeling good about yourself. I’m curious to know if any other moms out there also feel the need to get ready in order to feel best about themselves? Do you find getting yourself ready also helps you be more present? Any other tips or secrets for being present? I’m all ears! Leave a comment for a chance to win a $100 Visa Gift Card.

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