Hello.
We’re just getting back into the swing of things from our Disney Cruise last week. It was a great break and we had so much fun. I’m debating whether to do a cruise post or not right now, but I may throw something together in the next couple of days. I never really saw myself as a cruise person, but they’re actually quite fun and I think a great option for vacationing with young kids.
Anyway, as we were getting back into the routine today I found myself waking up yesterday morning with a start as I knew immediately that I had slept in, but I didn’t know how late it was! Turns out it wasn’t that late and I was actually super-happy to have one of those solid, dead-asleep type of sleeps where I don’t stir all night long. I don’t get that often enough. But here’s the thing, sleeping-in is nothing new to me…in fact, you could say that sleeping-in is my jam. Unfortunately, sleeping-in is not widely considered an “acceptable,”mature” or “grown-up” jam to have. And it’s got me thinking about the idea of sleeping-in vs napping, and frankly I feel like I may have stumbled on to a major conspiracy here. It seems to be universally acknowledged that sleeping-in is associated with laziness and slobbish behavior, whereas napping is associated with productivity and responsibility. I mean just consider the phrase “power-napping.” Are you kidding me?
I am an unapologetic sleeper-iner. I am a night owl both genetically and through years of personal dedication and training. As much as it is in my genes, I believe it also to be the way I was nurtured growing up. It is who I am. (Right now it’s 11:44 pm and I just sat down at the computer for a quick brainstorm session.) I hate to go to sleep, but once I am asleep, I hate to wake up. There have been periods of my life where I went to bed at an earlier time and thus I was able to consistently wake up earlier, but for the most part…I am a sleeper-in’r. In college sleeping-in could easily be until noon. EASILY. Whereas now sleeping in more like 8:30 (on weekends… this morning I “slept in” until 7:40). I will admit that like anything, balance is key and sleeping-in has definitely gotten me in trouble a time or two or twenty. One of my most embarrassing sleeping-in stories was when I was in college and missed my lunch shift at work because I had slept in until 1:00. In the afternoon. From the night before. I’m sure I didn’t go to sleep until 2 or 3 in the morning, but still that was straight up redonks. But regardless, as an adult I do not sleep in to ridiculous hours, but I still love to sleep in.
My husband on the other hand is a napper. He can get up early and on time no matter when he goes to bed, but if he had the opportunity he would nap everyday, and pretty much does nap anytime he has the chance. Almost every weekend he naps both Saturday and Sunday. It is a sad, sad weekend in his world when he doesn’t get a nap. And to be clear, his naps are usually not of the power variety.
But a few years ago our sleeping-in vs. napping personalities clashed and we had a little tussle about it. It was interesting as my husband was feeling frustrated with my sleeping-in and when I mentioned his napping habit, he was a little “so-what?” about it. I pointed out that we both liked getting additional sleep, I just did it differently than he did. I’m not someone who can just fall asleep at the drop of a hat–when I do nap it’s never really planned, it just happens. So for me, it’s just so much easier to sleep a little longer once I am asleep. And in fact napping feels much more obtrusive to me because it’s in the middle of the day! Additionally, I was frustrated because I felt that when he napped I tried to keep the kids quiet and shut the door so he could get some rest his way, but that when I slept-in he wasn’t as quick to reciprocate protecting my sleep and letting me get additional rest my way. Now I feel like we both are more accepting of each other’s additional sleep habits.
Really, I don’t blame him this is a conspiracy! This is a society wide prejudice. Sleeper-in’rs = lazy, Nappers = smart + productive.
Anyone else feel me on this one? Again I will reiterate the need for moderation…I never want to fall back into my crazy college days of sleeping in until noon, but sleeping-in until 8:30 or 9 should not be considered more lazy than someone who wakes up early but naps 1-2 hours during the day. Should it? Is there something I don’t know? I will admit that there is something nice about getting up early before the kids and getting things done in the wee hours (and I actually want to start getting up early again to work out), but in my world staying up late tends to accomplish the same things. Or does it? Thoughts? Are you pro-nap, pro-sleeping in or neither? Do you think sleeping-in has a worse reputation than napping?
I am with your husband, a weekend without a nap is a sad sad weekend. But so is a weekend where I am unable to sleep in til 9 on Saturday. (Church always ruins that on Sundays). And a Sunday afternoon nap is the best. So. I am both. I understand both of you.
Please do a Disney Cruise Post!! What boat did you go on? I had a friend who was a cast member on the Wonder and was able to go on 2 cruises for pretty much free. I do NOT like boats and yet I LOVED the Disney Cruise. Disney does everything so well and I felt safe. I would love to hear your experience with accessibility etc. while on the cruise.
A napper AND a sleeper-iner? You are winning at life my friend.
You know what, I think you convinced me to do a post…especially about what it's like traveling or doing a cruise from an accessibility standpoint. Thanks!
I don't have kids yet though. Talk to me in 2 years…
Oh, here here!!! I am sooooo a sleeper-inner (I like to blame it on early-morning seminary ruining me forever, but that probably wasn't it).
My husband is also opposite of me–woke up early every day his whole life because he grew up on a farm, and now it's just ingrained. It also works really well for him now because he can get up and go to work early enough to beat the traffic (AWESOME). But he too, does NOT like to see me sleep in on a Sat. morning. He however, doesn't usually get a chance to nap during the day, but as soon as he starts reading something in the evening, be it book or computer, he nods off and basically goes to sleep anytime after 8 pm. Then he can go to bed (if I nap anytime after 2 or so, I can't fall asleep forever that night).
Anyway, you basically said everything for me– I read something the other day about how mothers should guard their precious sleep–make it a priority, etc. But then you also want to have some time that is just yours, and is QUIET, and that is only in the late hours.
However, I would feel better about my late nights if I were doing things I really wanted to do, like reading a good book, accomplishing something, but generally it's just time-wasting, so I may as well be sleeping.
Yes! Early morning seminary was the bain of my existence. I usually didn't go to sleep until 1-2 in the morning in high school, so getting up a mere 4 hours later was brutal. To be honest I didn't even graduate b/c I didn't want to do a month of make-up work, but I went all 4 years and I am surprised I went as much as I did. And yes, there are always a hundred things on my to-do list in the evening and it's funny how often it gets spent wasting time…which is sometimes important too though.
I'm similar- I have a very hard time falling asleep during the day, so I take my "extra" sleep in the form of sleeping as late as the kids will allow. It's hard! My husband would prefer to sleep in and then also take a looooong nap and then stay up super-late every night. I'm only just recently coming to terms with not feeling guilty for sleeping in as late as possible.
So glad I'm not the only mom who is in bed until the last possible moment in the morning! And like you, I say I'm unapologetic about it, but only recently have I really tried not to feel guilty about it either. My little epiphany about naps helped. 😉
I love sleeping in and will do it whenever possible. I'm not a night owl though – I'm a middle of the day person! Naps are good when the sleeping in doesn't happen. I love sleep.
I'm totally a napper. Sleeping in will be like an extra 30 minutes, but I love a good weekend nap. In college I woke up at 5am for my job, but would take 2 hour naps every afternoon. I miss taking naps without being interrupted by kids.
I enjoy your blog, especially your Special Needs Spotlights. My husband and I have totally the same sleep habits as you and your husband. It's worked out perfectly fine through two kids and 43 years of marriage and especially works well in retirement! 🙂 –Night owl
I'm both! I love, love, love to sleep! I have to admit I feel guilty about it though. I always feel like I'm doing something wrong
My dear Miggy! You have hit the nail on the head, as you so often do!! We sleeper-inners have a bad rap! I, too, love to sleep in, and after 35 years of dragging myself out of the house at 7 a.m. to teach, I am done with early rising! Like you I am a night owl (it's 1:30 as I write!) my best sleeping is from 2 to 9:00, and later if I can. Yay retirement! My lovely husband likes a good hour nap on the sofa after dinner, at which time he wakes up long enough to say goodnight. On the weekends he likes to start rattling pans at about 9 if I'm not up!! As if I am lazy! Sleeper- inners unite! I'm so fired up now I'll be up for hours! ����
I love that you posted this interestingly controversy. My husband to., is very good at falling asleep at the drop of a dime. Not joking, I mean the middle of prayers, mid conversation, hey.. Are you seriously sleeping (no response) type of sleeper. It drives me nuts. I too love sleeping in (I am talking 7 am here). I enjoyed this post and I love the honesty in your writing 🙂
Wait? What? How do you find the time in your schedule to do either!? Saturdays see us up at 6:30-7ish for kids events/bootcamp/whatever. Sundays we can sleep until 9 and one of us (*cough*TheHubs*cough*) does but I'm still up around 7-7:30ish. I'd much rather be in bed around 10ish and then get up early to start my day, but the Hubs is very much like you and would love nothing more than to stay up late and sleep in to make up for it. It used to make me crazy- but now that the kids are older, it's not a big deal. Oddly enough we have one kid just like me and one like the Hubs- she makes getting up for a school day a joy. 😉
When my kids were young I trained them to stay up later and we slept in to nine every morning. When they got in school my hiney got out of bed early, then I became a napper. Now that they are grown, I do both. Ha! I never felt bad for sleeping in, napping or doing both. I say do whatever works for your family. Who cares what anyone else thinks;). I don't think one is more productive than another.
It is so cute to have lovely children on the bed like this.