My name is Jessica
Garwood. I married my husband Devin Garwood in February 2004. We
had our first child, Brody in 2005. We knew we wanted to have more
children so we started trying right away. Unfortunately I was unable to
get pregnant. We tried different fertility pills and different doses but
nothing was working. We finally decided to go to a specialist in
2011. Shortly thereafter we were both
excited when a pregnancy test came back positive! We had our first
ultrasound to see if I was for sure pregnant. Well, not only was there a
baby, there were two! The doctor said that there was a third sac but it
did not make it. We were kinda relieved because two babies would be
plenty! I had a normal pregnancy besides
ALL the morning sickness ALL the time. I
had Brayden and Bryson the afternoon of April 3, 2012. Brayden was born without his left eye–we
were told he just stopped developing. He
also has significant hearing loss and thus wears hearing aids.
Garwood. I married my husband Devin Garwood in February 2004. We
had our first child, Brody in 2005. We knew we wanted to have more
children so we started trying right away. Unfortunately I was unable to
get pregnant. We tried different fertility pills and different doses but
nothing was working. We finally decided to go to a specialist in
2011. Shortly thereafter we were both
excited when a pregnancy test came back positive! We had our first
ultrasound to see if I was for sure pregnant. Well, not only was there a
baby, there were two! The doctor said that there was a third sac but it
did not make it. We were kinda relieved because two babies would be
plenty! I had a normal pregnancy besides
ALL the morning sickness ALL the time. I
had Brayden and Bryson the afternoon of April 3, 2012. Brayden was born without his left eye–we
were told he just stopped developing. He
also has significant hearing loss and thus wears hearing aids.
***************
Miggy: Can you take me back to the day you knew your
son was going to have these extra issues–partial blindness and hearing loss? Do you remember how you felt? Can you
compare those first thoughts and feelings with how you feel now?
son was going to have these extra issues–partial blindness and hearing loss? Do you remember how you felt? Can you
compare those first thoughts and feelings with how you feel now?
Jessica: We found out about his
eye two days after he was born. He was
born on Tuesday April 3, 2012. We kept
asking the nurse about why he wouldn’t open his eye but no one would tell
us. Finally the doctor came in Thursday
and told us it just stopped developing.
I was heartbroken at first because I thought it was something that I
did. The doctor said it was just
“bad luck” and was nothing we did.
Today has been much easier than it was 9 months ago. Brayden is a very happy baby and is taking
everything wonderfully. With his hearing
he wasn’t passing any of the newborn hearing tests. We finally had to go to Wichita where they do
a longer test called an ABR that when we found out he would need hearing aides.
eye two days after he was born. He was
born on Tuesday April 3, 2012. We kept
asking the nurse about why he wouldn’t open his eye but no one would tell
us. Finally the doctor came in Thursday
and told us it just stopped developing.
I was heartbroken at first because I thought it was something that I
did. The doctor said it was just
“bad luck” and was nothing we did.
Today has been much easier than it was 9 months ago. Brayden is a very happy baby and is taking
everything wonderfully. With his hearing
he wasn’t passing any of the newborn hearing tests. We finally had to go to Wichita where they do
a longer test called an ABR that when we found out he would need hearing aides.
Miggy: Explain how your child’s specific special
need affects your day-to-day life?
need affects your day-to-day life?
Jessica: We have to put a
“conformer” in braydens eye to help the bones grow correctly. We have to always make sure it’s in his eye
since he likes to pull it out and him or his twin brother Bryson could put it
in their mouth. His twin likes to pull
his hearing aides out too. We have to be
a lot more cautious with all the extra items he has to wear.
“conformer” in braydens eye to help the bones grow correctly. We have to always make sure it’s in his eye
since he likes to pull it out and him or his twin brother Bryson could put it
in their mouth. His twin likes to pull
his hearing aides out too. We have to be
a lot more cautious with all the extra items he has to wear.
Miggy: What are the biggest worries you face for
your child?
your child?
Jessica: Just being able to get
help. We have been denied disability and had to get a lawyer to fight it.
I want him to be able to get the best help he possibly can so he can somewhat
leave a normal life. I want him to be
proud of who he is. I guess it’s good that it happened as a baby since he does
not know anything different. The kids at church LOVE him and no one treats him
different because of it.
help. We have been denied disability and had to get a lawyer to fight it.
I want him to be able to get the best help he possibly can so he can somewhat
leave a normal life. I want him to be
proud of who he is. I guess it’s good that it happened as a baby since he does
not know anything different. The kids at church LOVE him and no one treats him
different because of it.
Miggy: Now for a lighter question, have you ever had
any funny conversations/moments you never imagined due to your special needs
situations?
any funny conversations/moments you never imagined due to your special needs
situations?
Jessica: I never thought we would
need to tell his twin to “stop pulling your brothers hearing aides out or
don’t pull at his eye”
need to tell his twin to “stop pulling your brothers hearing aides out or
don’t pull at his eye”
Miggy: How can people best approach or respond to
your child? Is there something you wish
other people knew so as to avoid awkward or hurtful situations?
your child? Is there something you wish
other people knew so as to avoid awkward or hurtful situations?
Jessica: I know people are going
to want to look and wonder what happened.
I would rather people ask then just stare. I find it easier to be
ok with it when they ask if they can know what happened instead of just
blurting out “what happened to his eye!” Some days are harder. A young guy at Wal-Mart was just starting him
down, it made me upset that he has to go through that.
to want to look and wonder what happened.
I would rather people ask then just stare. I find it easier to be
ok with it when they ask if they can know what happened instead of just
blurting out “what happened to his eye!” Some days are harder. A young guy at Wal-Mart was just starting him
down, it made me upset that he has to go through that.
Miggy: What is the biggest lesson you’ve learned
since becoming a special needs mom?
since becoming a special needs mom?
Jessica: To be patient and take
it in stride. Some days have been hard and especially since we are fighting
with disability. I have to realize that some things take time and that
Brayden is a gift and we are grateful he is in our lives!
it in stride. Some days have been hard and especially since we are fighting
with disability. I have to realize that some things take time and that
Brayden is a gift and we are grateful he is in our lives!
Miggy: If you could say something to the mom who
just starting on this journey of special needs, what would you say?
What would you say to yourself if you could go back in time?
just starting on this journey of special needs, what would you say?
What would you say to yourself if you could go back in time?
Jessica: Don’t blame yourself.
That’s the first thing that came to my mind when the doctor told us. The same thing, don’t blame myself. I didn’t
drink or smoke and took care of myself. Some things just happen.
That’s the first thing that came to my mind when the doctor told us. The same thing, don’t blame myself. I didn’t
drink or smoke and took care of myself. Some things just happen.
Read more about our family here.
***************
I want to thank Jessica for sharing her cutie-pie Brayden with us. He is a doll! I have to say I find myself a little partial to kids born with ‘missing parts’ so to speak. 🙂 I really like what Jessica said at the end and it’s a good reminder to all us moms–it’s not our fault. I think most of us wonder if we did something wrong and like Jessica said… things happen. We can’t change the past or our children’s conditions, but we have everything to do with shaping their future and helping them see themselves for who they really are and what they are really capable of. Thanks again Jessica!
As always if you or someone you know would like to be a part of the spotlight please email me, or have them email me directly, at thislittlemiggy at gmail dot com.
Have a great weekend!
(I think I need a better Friday closing… ‘Be kind to one another’ is taken, but I’ll think of something…)
that is one adorable family.
Thank you of posting about this little boy. How lucky he is to have such a strong and loving mum and dad.
x
There are programs in each state for assistance for special needs. Granted each state is different and some have more to offer than others, disability is not the only thing out there. Also disability is biased on the parents income until a child is 18. I heard all the time from well meaning people that I should be getting it for my son, but the fact was, our income though low was still too high. I do find it odd though that you didn't just "automatically" get it becuase every time I tried for my son, I would be ask if he was blind and told, "if he was blind yes, no matter what he would automatically get help." Never understood that one at all. Good luck to you and aren't boys the best!! Fun times in your house for years to come that is for sure.
Don't blame yourself. Couldn't agree more.
Baby Brayden is adorable.
Thank you for these spotlights. I love them so much. I have a baby with special needs, and it's so heartening to hear about other babies like him. It makes me feel not so alone when I see the seas of no-health-problems kids around me.
Brayden is darling! I laughed at his twin pulling out his conformer and his hearing aids. That will make for some hilarious stories when they're older.
I love how you said not to blame yourself. so many people blame themselves unnecessarily. Whether you believe in him or not. I believe Brayden was sent to you for a reason with this disability so that he could have a loving family to take care of him. Good luck and he is seriously adorable!