Lamplight Tea Party

The girls had been playing quietly close to dinner time for much too long. I went to go inspect and instead of some terrible mess or other wicked behavior, I found them engaged in a lamplight tea party. Both girls dressed in their finest princess wear (Rapunzel and Snow White) with a little tea party set up at Lamp’s bedside table…the perfect height for Lamp’s powerchair. I knew this was all PSP’s doing. Be still my heart.

Pouring water from cup to cup and stirring pretend sugar in with dainty tea spoons. I almost hate myself for taking pictures–too precious to reduce to a few images, but the desire to capture these moments won out in the end. I’m not really sold on the idea of foreordained families and heavenly pacts to find each other (a light-hearted cultural Mormon idea stemming from a popular/cheesy production which I have actually never seen), but these two were a package deal, I know it. Don’t get me wrong, they still argue and have regular sisterly squabbles. They give each other crusties, and sometimes yell. Lamp is particularly expert at getting under her sisters skin by copying PSP word for word… drives her nuts. I never want to portray my life and family–even my children–like something they’re not, which is perfect. At least perfect in the sense that they never argue or disagree, because they do. But even with that in mind, I think these two have something special.

I get a lot of credit for being Lamp’s mom, but I’ve always known I couldn’t have done it without her big sister coming first. Of course I love both my girls equally and without thought or reason–I love them because I’m their mom. That’s it. But as an adult I also have the ability to work through and process emotions about being the mother of a daughter with special needs. What does that mean for us? How do we feel? How do we view the world differently? Yadda, yadda, yadda. But for PSP, there’s no processing or complex emotional thoughts. This is her sister and she loves her fiercely. Now lets go draw the curtains, turn on the lamp and have a tea party. It’s that simple… and I love her for it.

As a mom I take a lot of comfort in this relationship. Whatever ways I may screw up, the times I yell or lack patience and understanding… for all the inevitable mistakes, I can always take comfort in the fact that they had each other.

And if their mama didn’t make enough magic for them, they made it for themselves.