So after some personal research I’ve reached a shocking and most likely ground breaking conclusion regarding the internet. Ready? Ahem… I have learned that there is too much information for one person to ever read, view or listen to in one lifetime on the world wide web. Even if we’re just talking about all the uplifting, powerful, informative, positive, eye-opening, truthful, and really, really good articles/videos/blogs/podcasts, there is simply too much for one person to consume. Now I don’t have any hard and fast scientific data to back me up, but just trust me on this one.
Lately it seems like it’s always one last video, one last FB link, one last blog post, one last article before I go to bed, organize the house, hang with my kids, what have you.
And because whatever I’m about to read or watch has a really good message and will change how I view [insert critical social issue here], or even make me a better parent/spouse/friend it seems like I NEED to read/watch it immediately. And while the obvious contradiction of ignoring my children/spouse to read an article on how to be a better mother/wife is well… obvious, the thing is sometimes it IS really good, true and valuable information. I loved and shared this article on FB from Andrew WK wrote to a liberal son railing against his conservative dad as it sums up so eloquently my feelings on politics and even the world as a whole. (See? I just linked to it again because I want you all to read it. It’s a vicious cycle my friends.) I think that was a good and worthwhile read.
But as a wise boss once taught me, the enemy of the best is the good. You should all have too much to do, that way you are forced to choose “the best” to spend your time on.
So I’ve been trying to choose more best lately. Here is some of our best from the past week…
Enjoying the morning light with these three beautiful creatures before we start the day. My baby is determined not to be my baby much longer, squirming rolling and ever-so-close to crawling she is growing every day. It’s a conspiracy I tell you.
We also enjoyed having our cousins come visit this weekend and we took them down to Smale Riverfront Park where we swung on giant swings and let the girls get soaking wet in–get this–their clothes! Their actual clothes that aren’t even close to swimsuits–ha! Kids love it when you let them break the rules like that.
And Lamp, well she was down to her undies and dancing, shimmying and shaking like nobody’s bizniss. In case I haven’t already made it clear, she has this infectious love of life and carefree, what-you-lookin’-at? demeanor. Cute giggling kids, dancing in public fountains always draw attention. But cute, giggling limb-different kids, dancing in public fountains get double and triple takes, complete with whispers and timid pointing (usually all of this accompanied with smiles… most of the time it’s not mean spirited FYI.) But as her mom I sometimes worry I’m exposing her too much–stares, whispers and pointing, even in kindness or curiosity, leaves me feeling naked and exposed. But she either doesn’t notice, or doesn’t give a crap because there is too much fun to be had dancing in the fountains in her underwear doing her ‘bummy shakes’ and screaming with glee. And I decided I can’t shield her from the world and I won’t steal her joy to protect her from the curiosity of others. So underwear, don’t care was our motto as she danced in the fountains.
Yesterday we took a field trip to Mt. Airy forrest and visited the Treehouse once again. Yes we had been to this tree house when we lived in Cincy before, but that was pre-powerchair. And for some reason it never occurred to me how awesome and incredible it is that this is a handicap accessible tree house. One of only 8 in the country. And we live within a 20 minute drive. Awesome sauce. Thanks to these guys for thinking of things like that.
I freaking love the internet. But I don’t want to love the internet you know? Like spend time with the internet the way I spend time with my family. There is a lot of bad, mind-numbing and soul-crushing media out there, but there is a lot of good and amazing stuff too. But no matter how amazing, fun, entertaining, and even uplifting… I need to remind myself that real life, even boring, mundane real life needs to come first. At least most of the time. I’ve got to limit my consumption. Period. Of course it’s not just the internet or media in general, there is a lot of ‘good’ out there gunning for my time. I need to choose the best. It’s hard though. Like most of us, I just want to unwind at the end of the day, be entertained a little and just chill. And that’s not a bad thing. But my unwinding time is becoming a little too long, while my productivity is shrinking just a little too much. But it’s not going to be perfect. Finding balance never is.
The irony of posting this on my blog, is of course the fact that some of you may think about not reading my blog anymore. And that’s OK. But I will try to make this space worthwhile, but in the end you have to know I blog for me, my family and hopefully there are a few of you out there who find it worth a little time in your day. Right now I really want to get my studio set up. I need to be painting and creating again, in addition to enjoying the last days of summer with my littles. For me that is the best.
I’m sure I’m not the only one who struggles with this. How do you wisely manage your time online? I know I have severely limited the number of blogs I read. I’ve thought about canceling FB–at least temporarily–but that’s the only way I’m in contact with quite a few people. It’s a constant struggle of balance. I’d love to hear your thoughts…if you have the time.
Miggy, I love reading your blog and I hate the idea of you posting less frequently. Your posts are so thoughtful and they help me reevaluate myself as a parent, spouse, and creative thinker, and have opened my eyes to a new way of viewing the world of special needs, among other things. I understand the pull of other things on your time — I'm returning to college as a 40-something in a couple of weeks while working full time and raising teenagers — but there is still so much value in contributing to the positive aspects of the internet, and you are one of those things!! At least for me. 🙂 Keep on posting and tell us more about how you're balancing your life. We're committed to your awesome family!
I cancelled my FB almost 4 years ago, despite having many friends and family in different cities and states. Very shortly after, I realized that cancelling was the best decision for me and my family. I was constantly checking it and looking at it, and wondering what I was missing if I wasn't able to check it. When it was gone, it was amazing how free I felt. I was able to sit down with my kids and husband and just relax. I didn't feel like there was something in the back of my mind that I needed to "escape" to. Now that it's been so long, I don't even think about it, and I actually feel a little sick to my stomach if I ever think of going back to it. I realize that the people that are far from me all know how to reach me if they need, and I can contact them as well. I was able to let go of less meaningful relationships that I didn't really "need" to hold on to. I am able to run into people after long periods of time and actually "catch up" with what is going on in their lives instead of talking about the latest pictures that they posted. I won't ever go back to it, and it's great. I agree that the internet has a lot of great information out there, and I don't condemn anyone for having a FB account. But for me, I like keeping the internet time down to a minimum. I don't feel I'm missing out on anything at all.
I wish I could forever quit FB too! But then there are those things like free Reds tickets & pianos that I'd never discover. & then of course if I didn't spend all my time on Inatagram, I'd have never met you! I did quit FB for a week & got a lot done. I think I'll just periodically deactivate here & there. You just have to believe that what you are gaining is better than what you are missing.
Hi Miggy,
I think that the internet and Facebook waste enormous amounts of time, time that we can never get back. But, like you, I think there is a lot of wonderful information out there on the Internet. I try to limit my time on the net to a few really good blogs (including yours!), and my family does not do fb or twitter or instagram etc. If I want to know what a friend is doing, I phone/write/email them, and when I hear people complain about the time they spend every night on fb, I know that I have made the right decision. It doesn't worry me if there is no post on one of my favourite blogs, I just try again another day. When on holiday, I almost never check my email, or the blogs that I follow, and I find it very liberating!
Awesome caterpillar! Looks like a Cecropia (Silkmoth) spinning its cocoon!
Keeping up online, especially as a blogger, is really really hard, and I think the main reason that people quit blogging. I've cut way back on blogging and reading this summer. Sadly, I cannot say that all of the time I'm saving has been spent with my awesome little boy as a lot of it has been spent at work. It's such a hard balance and I end up staying up much too late. I think that you've got the right idea though – and I recently vowed to spend more time with my little as school too-quickly approaches. Here's to the best!
Hi Miggy, at a very similar urban water spray area like that on Pearl Street in Boulder, my daughter with autism got lots of stares, too. Not only for her yelling, clapping, and jumping, but also because she had to take her top off to be like the boys. She had just turned 5 then. If I had known Pearl Street had installed this thing, I would have brought her swimsuit. Then, there was a well-barricaded floral water fountain, which she wanted to climb and when I said she couldn’t, she freaked out big time to even more stares. At least, nobody came up to us and said anything that time. Also, I was making sure to avoid eye contact with anyone, lest they felt the need to say something rude, which has happened before. With disabilities, long after the grief of the diagnosis has worn off, it’s other people that continue to be a problem for us.
Mel
Underwear, don't care. This needs to go on t-shirts and bumper stickers.
Like you, I've cut my blog-reading down to almost nothing at all. But yours is one of the few I catch up on. Always interesting and of course I need to get my fill on those girls of yours. Love it, love you.
Love all the photos. You have no idea.
I’ve cut down on my internet activity 1) out of necessity and 2) because it seems that my 4-month-old is tons more fun than being on the internet. Sure, I read a few blogs and revamp my social conscience and track down a few recipes, but I just have to draw a line. Sometimes it’s a time limit or a certain number of articles.
What I appreciate is your approach: You mention reading about so many uplifting things on the internet. And I agree that there’s so much out there and you have to decide what’s good/better/best. And then you go out and enjoy life sans internet and take all these priceless pictures and document experiences and then you come back to the internet to share them.
Then I come to the internet, to your blog, which sorts as “best” in my estimation.
Thanks for my making my time online so worthwhile.